Understanding exhibitionism

While the word 'exhibitionist' might have you thinking of performance artists or porn stars, you don’t have to be professionally naked to be one. Most exhibitionists are Average Joes: office managers, teachers, and bartenders who love to bare it all once they clock out.

These folks love baring it all for onlookers, from strangers catching them in the act to people they’ve invited over for a night of fun. No matter what flavor of exhibitionism gives you the biggest thrills, you can get started exploring it today.

Try exhibitionism on for starters

Like most kinks, you don’t have to go whole hog to try your hand at exhibitionism. If you’re curious, start small. Leave the window open the next time you have sex, or try wandering your apartment naked, daring a jogger or the apartment across the way to enjoy the view. Just be careful that the only people who might wander by are adults; keeping unsuspecting children outside safe takes precedent over your newfound love of exhibitionistic behavior.

When you're in the clear, whip those genitals out and give the world a show, while also soaking in the sights of passerby. Exhibitionism, when done etthically, is an awakening. That first exposure is one sexual event that may trigger new behaviour that will last a lifetime.

If leaving the blinds cracked was enough to get you off, you may be ready to take it to the next level. This should be a capital E Event, and you deserve to treat yourself. Solo or partnered, rent a hotel for the night that has a window facing another building. 

During the day, have sex on the balcony. At night, turn the lights on, open those curtains, and put on the show of a lifetime for the folks across the way. Playing alone? Do the same thing with your best masturbating tricks, wearing an outfit that you feel sexy in. Slowly take it off while facing the window, until you’re baring it all, and bursting with your desire.

Nervous or on too tight of a budget to rent a hotel room? Have sex in your apartment building or home right next to the front door or window. Be loud about it. Let the world know you’re getting the ride of a lifetime, and don’t be too shy to unleash those moans, rumbles, growls, and howls.

Talk about exhibitionism

First things first: to have a sexual experience, you need to be prepared to act - but also have to start by talking about it. Exhibitionism fantasies are usually intimidating to share with your partner. We're usually used to having sex one set way together. Changing the definition of how we stimulate our genitals together can seem like a terminal diagnosis for the relationship. But talking about sex is actually sexy, and letting your partner know about your longing for exposure is the only way to start living your exhibitionism dreams.

Let them know what you’re looking for – and be specific. If you just say that you have some vague exhibitionistic fantasy, they might have a totally different idea of what that means than you do. When sharing your desires, lay it all out there: we’re sitting at a table at a restaurant when you slip your hands under the table and start rubbing my genitals. I’m trying my best not to moan; my face is also getting flushed. A waiter arrives and asks me what I’d like. I try not to stutter, but the act of this exposure makes my voice break as I’m ordering my cocktail. He looks at me funny. God, the exposure and every related stroke is a rush. Meanwhile, you act like nothing's wrong, and ask for a glass of Merlot.

Even talking these fantasies out is an act of exhibitionism, and the more details you offer, the sooner you and your partner can figure out how to make it a reality.

Ready to take it to the next level?

If you want to do more than just dip your toes in, if you’re ready to chow down on the sexy world of displaying yourself for all to enjoy, then you’re in for a ride – and you have no limit of options for getting started.

Attend an orgy

This is a popular choice for exploring your sexuality for a reason. Orgies aren’t just for polyamorous or nonmonogamous poeple, either, and all sex parties have rules about consent. If you want to be watched, but are monogamous and just want to sleep with the person you came with, you’ll find plenty of willing participants who would love to watch you and your partner go to town on each other. 

Share your fantasy with the group, or to a particular person who catches your eye. They'll be more than willing to accommodate - you’ll find people who are eager to masturbate while you have sex. If you’re interested, you may even find someone who wants to instruct you and your partner on the act. Flying solo? Have someone instruct you on how to masturbate, like your very own live JOI video. 

Play in public

Indecent exposure transcends just going at it in the common bar bathroom. It may have been your first exposure to your exhibitionistic sexual awakening, seeing your genitals flash in the bar mirror as you were pushed against the sink by your eager lover. However it happened, exhibitionism is one rush set of urges true form emerges with pizzazz when a person follows that need to the end in public spaces. With technology at our fingertips, remote control vibrators are your friend. For exhibitionism at its finest, enjoy the sexual act of your partner taking you to the movies. During one steamy sex act on screen, they can turn your toy on and enjoy your quivering reaction.

Feeling extra exhibitionistic? Get sexual with a hidden toy while waiting in line at the post office, or reading an article in a waiting room.

When exhibitionism becomes a disorder

Exhibitionism is an amazing way to deepen your sexual relationship with yourself and your partner. But like too much of any good thing, when exhibitionism transcends kink and becomes a compulsion, you may have to pause the chapter on your exhibitionistic act and seek treatment from open-minded medical professionals.

Www. dictionary. com defines exhibitionism in these words: a disorder characterized especially by a compulsion to exhibit the genitals in public. If you find you can't hold back on that act, your exhibitionism may have crossed into nonconsensual territory - and this call for exposure could ruin your life and traumatize others.

Let's be clear: exhibitionism isn't always a problem. There's no need for a diagnosis from Therapy, Inc. when you enjoy yourself in front of men and women who are consenting. Loving attention and star treatment at an orgy often is one thing. However, exposing your genitals to the detriment of your personal life falls under the realm of disorders.

An individual can seek treatment for this diagnosis, however, and not all hope is lost. If and when you seek help and treatment, make sure you go to a sex-positive (and also kink-aware) therapist. This person is well-versed in sexual health topics. They will act with integrity, provide you with help you need, and give you treatment for this kink that has become a source of disorder in your life. However, these therapists won't shame you, and will help you move past the diagnosis/disorder, and into a fulfilling sex life that may even include healthy doses of safe exhibitionism down the line.

Let your exhibitionistic streak fly tonight

Exhibitionism may be a disorder, but it's also a normal expression of sexuality. Your sexual need is bubbling up inside you - and the only treatment to this sexy diagnosis? Indecent exposure of the most consensual kind.

Put those genitals on display, and learn about all the ways exhibitionism can set your heart ablaze.